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If the young person has been sent to you, either by their teacher or their parent, the chances are that they won’t say anything.
The silence can go on for an unnerving length of time. It may last the entire 45 minutes of your counselling session. It may even continue for several sessions. The young person may be aggressive towards you. They will have been ordered to attend the meeting against their will. And they may be opposed to everyone, without exception. That is alright.
The young person may be silent because they don’t want to engage in a verbal contest which they might lose. Experience may have taught them that discussions with adults end with the adult shouting, or even striking them. Silence may be their only refuge.
Don’t keep trying to get the young person to talk. Try different approaches.
- Go out for a walk with them. A change of scenery can change their mood.
- Ask them to undertake a task that has no emotional involvement. Make sure the task is one that they can complete successfully. For example, you can ask them to complete a list of their interests.
